More Self Discovery

More Self Discovery

My first experience trying to tie myself up was unsatisfactory in that I never really achieved a complete helplessness. At the time, I didn't think it could be achieved, but felt that I wanted it. I began daydreaming about being tied up in ways that I could not escape from.

I did a little research, and played with knots when I could. My parents and brother were usually home and I couldn't really do much with them around, but I actually learned some things in the privacy of my own room. Then one day, my parents and brother went out and were not scheduled to return until dinner time. I had a solid four hours to play alone, and I prepared for it.

The parents left, telling me not to get into trouble. I was 14, a freshman in high school, and was still a virgin but just barely. I had been dating a couple of guys informally and sneaked out to see one of them when I could. I could easily have gotten one of them over to get into trouble, but at this point I wanted to see what I could do alone.

This time, I stripped first. The experience before was exciting and turned me on, a lot. I wanted to experience that again. The sensation of being naked increased my sense of daring, as well as making me feel vulnerable and excited. I was wet between my legs before I removed my panties. Touching myself with my hand, I rubbed my clit for a while, just feeling the sensation of being completely naked in the house, and the sensual turn on of anticipating being tied up.

I began with my ankles. It was an easy decision. This time though, I crossed my ankles before tying, and used the rope to crisscross the ankles. This spread my legs while still tying me securely. I tested the tie a bit, making sure it was secure, and then played with myself for a while, masturbating and  taking the wetness on my fingers to my nipples.

Next, I took some panties from my laundry. They weren't "dirty", but they weren't fresh either. I put them in my mouth, pushing the cloth deep inside the cavity of my left cheek, then inside the center over my tongue, and then pushing into my right cheek. It wasn't nearly enough. I could feel that the gag wasn't complete, so I got up to find some more cloth.

And fell over, because my ankles were tied. DUH. Rather than untie and retie my ankles, I dragged myself over to my laundry and sorted through for something suitable. All I found was a pair of gym socks. I considered briefly whether I wanted them stuffed inside my mouth and decided it would have to do. Restuffing my panties in, I followed them with the socks. When I was done, my cheeks were bulging and my tongue was pushed down and back, my mouth was so full. I dragged myself back to my desk where I had some wide silver tape I had gotten from my dad's tool box.

The cloth kept coming out. I stuffed it back in and then started wrapping the tape around my wide open but full mouth. My hair was tied back in a pony so it wasn't too hard to get the tape all around my head and around my mouth several times. After about 10 wraps around, I decided it was secure and stopped for a bit to consider my next move.

That gag was strong and effective. I couldn't make much noise. I sat on the floor with my knees spread and masturbated some more. The feeling of helplessness I wanted was coming on and exciting me as I moved my fingers inside myself, pushing and sliding over my clit. My nipples were hard. I pinched them, and felt a surge of pleasure and excitement. I pinched them harder, feeling a little pain that simply excited me more. It was then I had another idea.

Mouth gagged securely and ankles tied I dragged myself into the bathroom next to my own room. There I found a basket that contained what I wanted - clothespins. I grabbed a handful and dragged myself back to my room. I was getting rug burn and realized I wasn't as prepared as I thought I was. Time to get a move on.


One clothespin in hand, I pulled and massaged one erect nipple to its fullest and then placed the clamp on it. As the spring pressed down and closed on the sensitive flesh, I emitted a muffled yelp! It hurt a lot more than I thought it would. I quickly removed the pin, and yelped again as it came off. Wow, that was intense. But I wanted it, desperately. Weirder and weirder I thought, but I was so hot and aroused by now I could take the pain. I put the clamp back on my left nipple, cringing at the pain and waiting a moment before massaging my right breast, pulling the nipple out and clamping it as well.

Fuck, it hurt. But strangely as I sat there and felt the pain, it seemed to diminish. It ached, but I could take it.

I took a rope down from the top of my desk. It had been pretied in a way I had learned by doing a little research. It was a way of tying my wrists by using a knot that was already tied in a loop, then just pulling the loop tight.  I had already thought through how to pull on the loop to tighten around my wrists. The other end of the rope would go around my ankles, of course!  They would naturally pull and tighten the loop, right?

One end of the rope went around my ankles. It was looped, not tied. I pulled on it to make sure it was secure around my ankles and then moved away to a pre-tied rope that was on the floor next to me. This was the special treat of which I was so proud; I had played with it before to get it right.

It was a sort of figure 8 tie, that had two loops on each end with the rope wrapped in the middle. The loops would cinch tighter if pulled (though not a lot, I hadn't gotten that part perfected yet). Reaching my arms behind my back I slid each loop of the figure 8 over one of my hands. By pushing and rolling the ropes higher, I managed to get them up to my elbows before my arms couldnt stand it any more and I relaxed, spreading my elbows apart and cinching the rope tight around my arms. My elbows were now about a foot or so apart behind my back.

I lay there for a moment. My hands were still free but the tie around my elbows had restricted me, a lot. My breathing was fast and shallow, partly from the effort I had put into getting the elbow ropes on, and partly because I was so aroused. I wanted to cum but reaching my clit was no longer possible. It was time for the last step.

I lay on my side and bent my knees as much as I could. The rope that went around my ankles and ended in the wrist loops was too short; I needed to get my feet further up. I wriggled to where I could press my knees against the desk for support and then curved and bent my back so that I could reach my hands all the way to my feet. I grabbed the loops (there was one for each wrist with a wrapping in between) and managed to get my wrists into them.

It had been a huge struggle to get myself tied and I finally relaxed. As I relaxed, my legs moved away from my wrists a few inches and pulled the cinch tie tight. Whamo! I felt it immediately. The rope encircled my wrists, my body naturally pulling my legs away and keeping the cinch tight. Wow, it felt good. I was helpless.

I lay on my side, panting a bit. I had successfully and unwittingly placed myself into a rather tight, constricting hogtie. It felt marvelous. I wriggled, and all it did was make the ropes tighter. I rolled onto my stomach, and felt my legs sag down and pull my arms back and shoulders up. I was in an inverted curve and either my shoulders would be pulled back or my legs would have to be pushed up.

The clothespins on my nipples continued to hurt, but not nearly as badly as when I had first put them on. The flesh ached, and I realized for the first time that my self tie prevented me from stopping the pain. My wrists and hands were aching from the tight ropes which constricted blood flow. I forced myself back to relieve some of the tightness, and got no relief.

I rolled over again, considering my predicament. I was stark naked on the floor of my room. My breasts jutted out in front of me, with clothespins on the nipples. My wrists were effectively tied to my ankles, which were in turn tied in a way that forced my knees apart, exposing my pussy. I had done better than I had ever imagined. I writhed for a little while, struggling.

My ties were complete. I was secure, and it was going to be damn hard to get out of. The elbow ropes were the surprise to me; the effectively stopped me from moving my wrists around to reach the knots. I hadn't bargained on this and I began to wonder how I was going to get out of this.

OK. Yeah. I was 14, and naive. Really naive. I may have prepared for this play session and set things up for a secure self bondage session but I hadn't thought far enough ahead to make sure I could get out of it.  Panic rippled across my body and I started struggling and writhing. I saw the clock. Two hours had passed, my parents would be home in two hours and find me here! Excuses ran through my head, explanations. A rogue rapist had broken into the house and tied me up. That was it, I could explain it that way. Except the house was locked from the inside and there was no break in. What was I going to do?

The ropes were tight, and I wriggled my hands to try and get free. My jaw was hurting from how far wide it was being held open; I bit down on the panties and socks, that helped a bit. My nipples were burning with a deep pain that was turning into numbness. My legs were cramping, and when they cramped I automatically tried to move them out straight, which pulled on the wrist cinch until my hands hurt, badly.  I started to cry. I tried to yell. Nope... the gag was a good one. It muffled the sound.

Finally, I stopped. It was time to get real and think. There was only one way out that I could think of, it was a long shot but I had to try.  I had to get a knife from the kitchen and cut myself loose.

If you have ever been in a hogtie, you will know that it isn't easy to travel in it. Small movements can be made with a lot of effort. The most effective way to move is to roll to one side, scoot legs forward then roll to the other side, and so on. When I got into the hall, I tried rolling all the way over onto my back. It was humiliating, as my body arched up, pushing my hips into the air with my legs spread wide as if I were welcoming some guy to fuck me.

It was incredibly slow going, and every move made the ropes tighter. About a half hour later and most of the way down the hall my right nipple clamp rubbed off and I screamed in pain. I had no idea that taking the clamps off would be more painful than putting them on; I lay there on the hall carpet and sobbed into my gag for a bit and then pressed my other breast down and wriggled until that clamp came off as well. I screamed again and then began wriggling down the hall toward the kitchen.

In the kitchen, I was faced with a difficulty. The knives were sitting in a knife block on the counter. The counter was about 3 feet higher than I was. I lay looking at the knives and cried, tears running down my face and over the tape of my self imposed gag.

There was a footstool in the corner. That was the only option. Slowly, painfully, I wriggled over to it. When I reached it I pushed it with my head, two or three inches at a time. It finally made it over to the counter.

My whole body ached and cramped. It hurt horribly. My left leg had a charlie horse, and my shoulders ached as well. My jaw ached from the gag. I writhed, feeling the wetness between my legs which indicated I was still aroused beyond belief.

Right then, at that moment, I decided I needed a boyfriend to help me. I wasn't going to tie myself up again. I needed a guy to be there, to control me. It made sense. I wanted to feel helpless and I was amazed at how horny I was tied up like this, but I also knew I needed to be submitting to someone else, not just tying myself up.  Strangely, this thought motivated me and I started the task of getting my body up onto the first step of the stepstool.

My breasts rested on the first step, flattened out on display. The metal edge of the step scraped against my ribs as I wriggled a few inches higher, leaning against the step. Inch by inch I pushed my body higher, leaning against the steps.

Thank god there was a plate at the top, next to the block of knives. I pushed it with my head and the knives slid. I pushed and maneuvered until finally the knives fell from the counter to the floor with a loud clatter. I literally threw myself down off the step stool and landed on the floor next to the knives. I got one in my hand (which was numb) and started sawing.

The clock on the wall said I had 10 minutes. I sawed faster. It wasn't working. I was getting the barest bit of rope to separate. At this rate it was going to take an hour. I fumbled around, feeling the knives, finally finding one with a serrated edge. That one worked better. The rope began to fray and stretch. I sawed harder, unable to be very effective because of limited movement. Suddenly, my legs straightened out. The rope from my ankles to my wrists had given way and I was no longer bent back. I let out a muffled whoop and then cry as the cramps rolled through my naked body once again.

Once the rope around my wrists was cut away from my ankles, I was able to work them free. I was then able to roll and move the elbow restraints and finally undo my ankles. When the gag came off it hurt like the dickens, the tape taking some of the hair behind my neck with it. The panties and socks came out, and I was free.

The parents were 10 minutes late. I gathered the remnants of rope, tape and gag together and limped to my room. I hid the remains of my bondage, lay down on the bed, spread my legs wide and started masturbating furiously. I came in less than a minute, after which I lay panting and recovered from my experience.

When my parents came home a few minutes later I was showering. I was bruised, had some minor scrapes, but was none the worse for the bondage.

I knew what I wanted then. And I also knew I needed someone else to play with in order to get it.

My first experience trying to tie myself up was unsatisfactory in that I never really achieved a complete helplessness. At the time, I didn't think it could be achieved, but felt that I wanted it. I began daydreaming about being tied up in ways that I could not escape from.

I did a little research, and played with knots when I could. My parents and brother were usually home and I couldn't really do much with them around, but I actually learned some things in the privacy of my own room. Then one day, my parents and brother went out and were not scheduled to return until dinner time. I had a solid four hours to play alone, and I prepared for it.

The parents left, telling me not to get into trouble. I was 14, a freshman in high school, and was still a virgin but just barely. I had been dating a couple of guys informally and sneaked out to see one of them when I could. I could easily have gotten one of them over to get into trouble, but at this point I wanted to see what I could do alone.

This time, I stripped first. The experience before was exciting and turned me on, a lot. I wanted to experience that again. The sensation of being naked increased my sense of daring, as well as making me feel vulnerable and excited. I was wet between my legs before I removed my panties. Touching myself with my hand, I rubbed my clit for a while, just feeling the sensation of being completely naked in the house, and the sensual turn on of anticipating being tied up.

I began with my ankles. It was an easy decision. This time though, I crossed my ankles before tying, and used the rope to crisscross the ankles. This spread my legs while still tying me securely. I tested the tie a bit, making sure it was secure, and then played with myself for a while, masturbating and  taking the wetness on my fingers to my nipples.

Next, I took some panties from my laundry. They weren't "dirty", but they weren't fresh either. I put them in my mouth, pushing the cloth deep inside the cavity of my left cheek, then inside the center over my tongue, and then pushing into my right cheek. It wasn't nearly enough. I could feel that the gag wasn't complete, so I got up to find some more cloth.

And fell over, because my ankles were tied. DUH. Rather than untie and retie my ankles, I dragged myself over to my laundry and sorted through for something suitable. All I found was a pair of gym socks. I considered briefly whether I wanted them stuffed inside my mouth and decided it would have to do. Restuffing my panties in, I followed them with the socks. When I was done, my cheeks were bulging and my tongue was pushed down and back, my mouth was so full. I dragged myself back to my desk where I had some wide silver tape I had gotten from my dad's tool box.

The cloth kept coming out. I stuffed it back in and then started wrapping the tape around my wide open but full mouth. My hair was tied back in a pony so it wasn't too hard to get the tape all around my head and around my mouth several times. After about 10 wraps around, I decided it was secure and stopped for a bit to consider my next move.

That gag was strong and effective. I couldn't make much noise. I sat on the floor with my knees spread and masturbated some more. The feeling of helplessness I wanted was coming on and exciting me as I moved my fingers inside myself, pushing and sliding over my clit. My nipples were hard. I pinched them, and felt a surge of pleasure and excitement. I pinched them harder, feeling a little pain that simply excited me more. It was then I had another idea.

Mouth gagged securely and ankles tied I dragged myself into the bathroom next to my own room. There I found a basket that contained what I wanted - clothespins. I grabbed a handful and dragged myself back to my room. I was getting rug burn and realized I wasn't as prepared as I thought I was. Time to get a move on.


One clothespin in hand, I pulled and massaged one erect nipple to its fullest and then placed the clamp on it. As the spring pressed down and closed on the sensitive flesh, I emitted a muffled yelp! It hurt a lot more than I thought it would. I quickly removed the pin, and yelped again as it came off. Wow, that was intense. But I wanted it, desperately. Weirder and weirder I thought, but I was so hot and aroused by now I could take the pain. I put the clamp back on my left nipple, cringing at the pain and waiting a moment before massaging my right breast, pulling the nipple out and clamping it as well.

Fuck, it hurt. But strangely as I sat there and felt the pain, it seemed to diminish. It ached, but I could take it.

I took a rope down from the top of my desk. It had been pretied in a way I had learned by doing a little research. It was a way of tying my wrists by using a knot that was already tied in a loop, then just pulling the loop tight.  I had already thought through how to pull on the loop to tighten around my wrists. The other end of the rope would go around my ankles, of course!  They would naturally pull and tighten the loop, right?

One end of the rope went around my ankles. It was looped, not tied. I pulled on it to make sure it was secure around my ankles and then moved away to a pre-tied rope that was on the floor next to me. This was the special treat of which I was so proud; I had played with it before to get it right.

It was a sort of figure 8 tie, that had two loops on each end with the rope wrapped in the middle. The loops would cinch tighter if pulled (though not a lot, I hadn't gotten that part perfected yet). Reaching my arms behind my back I slid each loop of the figure 8 over one of my hands. By pushing and rolling the ropes higher, I managed to get them up to my elbows before my arms couldnt stand it any more and I relaxed, spreading my elbows apart and cinching the rope tight around my arms. My elbows were now about a foot or so apart behind my back.

I lay there for a moment. My hands were still free but the tie around my elbows had restricted me, a lot. My breathing was fast and shallow, partly from the effort I had put into getting the elbow ropes on, and partly because I was so aroused. I wanted to cum but reaching my clit was no longer possible. It was time for the last step.

I lay on my side and bent my knees as much as I could. The rope that went around my ankles and ended in the wrist loops was too short; I needed to get my feet further up. I wriggled to where I could press my knees against the desk for support and then curved and bent my back so that I could reach my hands all the way to my feet. I grabbed the loops (there was one for each wrist with a wrapping in between) and managed to get my wrists into them.

It had been a huge struggle to get myself tied and I finally relaxed. As I relaxed, my legs moved away from my wrists a few inches and pulled the cinch tie tight. Whamo! I felt it immediately. The rope encircled my wrists, my body naturally pulling my legs away and keeping the cinch tight. Wow, it felt good. I was helpless.

I lay on my side, panting a bit. I had successfully and unwittingly placed myself into a rather tight, constricting hogtie. It felt marvelous. I wriggled, and all it did was make the ropes tighter. I rolled onto my stomach, and felt my legs sag down and pull my arms back and shoulders up. I was in an inverted curve and either my shoulders would be pulled back or my legs would have to be pushed up.

The clothespins on my nipples continued to hurt, but not nearly as badly as when I had first put them on. The flesh ached, and I realized for the first time that my self tie prevented me from stopping the pain. My wrists and hands were aching from the tight ropes which constricted blood flow. I forced myself back to relieve some of the tightness, and got no relief.

I rolled over again, considering my predicament. I was stark naked on the floor of my room. My breasts jutted out in front of me, with clothespins on the nipples. My wrists were effectively tied to my ankles, which were in turn tied in a way that forced my knees apart, exposing my pussy. I had done better than I had ever imagined. I writhed for a little while, struggling.

My ties were complete. I was secure, and it was going to be damn hard to get out of. The elbow ropes were the surprise to me; the effectively stopped me from moving my wrists around to reach the knots. I hadn't bargained on this and I began to wonder how I was going to get out of this.

OK. Yeah. I was 14, and naive. Really naive. I may have prepared for this play session and set things up for a secure self bondage session but I hadn't thought far enough ahead to make sure I could get out of it.  Panic rippled across my body and I started struggling and writhing. I saw the clock. Two hours had passed, my parents would be home in two hours and find me here! Excuses ran through my head, explanations. A rogue rapist had broken into the house and tied me up. That was it, I could explain it that way. Except the house was locked from the inside and there was no break in. What was I going to do?

The ropes were tight, and I wriggled my hands to try and get free. My jaw was hurting from how far wide it was being held open; I bit down on the panties and socks, that helped a bit. My nipples were burning with a deep pain that was turning into numbness. My legs were cramping, and when they cramped I automatically tried to move them out straight, which pulled on the wrist cinch until my hands hurt, badly.  I started to cry. I tried to yell. Nope... the gag was a good one. It muffled the sound.

Finally, I stopped. It was time to get real and think. There was only one way out that I could think of, it was a long shot but I had to try.  I had to get a knife from the kitchen and cut myself loose.

If you have ever been in a hogtie, you will know that it isn't easy to travel in it. Small movements can be made with a lot of effort. The most effective way to move is to roll to one side, scoot legs forward then roll to the other side, and so on. When I got into the hall, I tried rolling all the way over onto my back. It was humiliating, as my body arched up, pushing my hips into the air with my legs spread wide as if I were welcoming some guy to fuck me.

It was incredibly slow going, and every move made the ropes tighter. About a half hour later and most of the way down the hall my right nipple clamp rubbed off and I screamed in pain. I had no idea that taking the clamps off would be more painful than putting them on; I lay there on the hall carpet and sobbed into my gag for a bit and then pressed my other breast down and wriggled until that clamp came off as well. I screamed again and then began wriggling down the hall toward the kitchen.

In the kitchen, I was faced with a difficulty. The knives were sitting in a knife block on the counter. The counter was about 3 feet higher than I was. I lay looking at the knives and cried, tears running down my face and over the tape of my self imposed gag.

There was a footstool in the corner. That was the only option. Slowly, painfully, I wriggled over to it. When I reached it I pushed it with my head, two or three inches at a time. It finally made it over to the counter.

My whole body ached and cramped. It hurt horribly. My left leg had a charlie horse, and my shoulders ached as well. My jaw ached from the gag. I writhed, feeling the wetness between my legs which indicated I was still aroused beyond belief.

Right then, at that moment, I decided I needed a boyfriend to help me. I wasn't going to tie myself up again. I needed a guy to be there, to control me. It made sense. I wanted to feel helpless and I was amazed at how horny I was tied up like this, but I also knew I needed to be submitting to someone else, not just tying myself up.  Strangely, this thought motivated me and I started the task of getting my body up onto the first step of the stepstool.

My breasts rested on the first step, flattened out on display. The metal edge of the step scraped against my ribs as I wriggled a few inches higher, leaning against the step. Inch by inch I pushed my body higher, leaning against the steps.

Thank god there was a plate at the top, next to the block of knives. I pushed it with my head and the knives slid. I pushed and maneuvered until finally the knives fell from the counter to the floor with a loud clatter. I literally threw myself down off the step stool and landed on the floor next to the knives. I got one in my hand (which was numb) and started sawing.

The clock on the wall said I had 10 minutes. I sawed faster. It wasn't working. I was getting the barest bit of rope to separate. At this rate it was going to take an hour. I fumbled around, feeling the knives, finally finding one with a serrated edge. That one worked better. The rope began to fray and stretch. I sawed harder, unable to be very effective because of limited movement. Suddenly, my legs straightened out. The rope from my ankles to my wrists had given way and I was no longer bent back. I let out a muffled whoop and then cry as the cramps rolled through my naked body once again.

Once the rope around my wrists was cut away from my ankles, I was able to work them free. I was then able to roll and move the elbow restraints and finally undo my ankles. When the gag came off it hurt like the dickens, the tape taking some of the hair behind my neck with it. The panties and socks came out, and I was free.

The parents were 10 minutes late. I gathered the remnants of rope, tape and gag together and limped to my room. I hid the remains of my bondage, lay down on the bed, spread my legs wide and started masturbating furiously. I came in less than a minute, after which I lay panting and recovered from my experience.

When my parents came home a few minutes later I was showering. I was bruised, had some minor scrapes, but was none the worse for the bondage.

I knew what I wanted then. And I also knew I needed someone else to play with in order to get it.

Anal Punishment

Anal Punishment

Slavery to my husband has been wonderfully fulfilling to me in ways I never imagined. Feeling completely owned, completely devoted, completely possessed by him is a dream come true. Acts of discipline reinforce the relationship, and remind me of my subservient position in ways that make me feel excited, happy. Part of the reason for this is that my slavery is such an opposite experience to my outside life.

I am in management in the IT department of a large company, a professional with a number of direct reports. There, I must exercise my mind, wield control, make decisions and manage complex outcomes. Work can sometimes be stressful, and preoccupies my mind. It was this tendency of getting caught up in work that prompted a very practical lesson from Jason.

I was home late from work, for the third night in a row.

“Jason, I am sorry, but the server upgrades are going slower than planned and we have to set up the downtime for the weekend.”

Jason looked upset.

“Siobhan, I understand. I really do. And your financial contribution to our finances is great, and I support your work. But dear, you not only have a responsibility here at home, you have a –”

Cutting him short, I argued with what I knew he would say. “Yes, I know. I know. I am yours, I know this and I intend to fulfill my duties. But right now work is simply demanding, and you know how IT is.”

The argument went on a little further. Jason was entering one of his cool rages, and it testifies to how wrapped up in work I was that I missed the warning signs. But I did, and suddenly, without saying a word, he reached out, snapped a leash chain to my permanent slave collar, and started leading me upstairs.

“Jason, I am sorry. I didn’t mean disrespect… please… don’t punish me.” I knew by now I had overstepped and he was not pleased at all. I was his slave, and he was about to remind me of that fact.

When we reached our bedroom, he yanked the chain to the bed. He then turned me, pushed me onto the bed face down, and drew my wrists behind my back. Handcuffs snapped into place and I lay there, beginning to cry just a little but not moving. I knew that I needed to be very still and obey his every word at this point, if I was going to minimize his anger and the punishment.

Jason took hold of my skirt and pulled it down my legs with a single hard yank. The fabric tore as it went down, and the zipper scraped my thigh (leaving a long welt which I discovered later). I yelped more from surprise than pain but managed to stay still, laying on my stomach, with my legs over the edge of the bed.

My panties were yanked down next, and easily, leaving my ass exposed and just on the edge of the mattress. I was crying now, tears running down my cheeks and I buried my face in the blanket, unable to wipe them off.

I heard Jason remove his pants, and then his naked legs came between mine, spreading them. His hands grabbed my ass cheeks, and pulled them wide apart. I realized with a twinge of panic what he was going to do.

“Please, please… Jason, don’t do this. You know how it hurts, I am sorry and will behave… please at least use lube…”

The tip of his cock pressed against my anus. I buried my head once more and concentrated on relaxing as best I could. It was hard, I was paniced and emotionally very upset. Pushing back on his cock as he pressed in, hard, I could feel it begin to penetrate my rectum… and then the pain started.

Jason’s cock isn’t huge, but it is pretty large, and gets very hard when he is aroused. He was impaling my ass without lube, and it was going to hurt. With a sudden, massive shove, his hips thrust and cock jammed into my anus, penetrating several inches. I cried out in pain, I felt like the senstive flesh was being ripped and torn, the muscles over stretched. I wriggled some, and he slapped my ass hard with his hand several times.

“Oh god oh god oh god...” I was whimpering, and then the second massive shove came. My scream was muffled from where my face was buried in the bedding, and I tried to struggle. He grabbed my handcuffed wrists and pulled on them, yanking my shoulders back painfully, raising my head out of the bed and shoving my ass back onto his huge cock.

My sphincter was completely convulsing around him, trying to expel him with no success. He withdrew a few inches, and then shoved again, this time pulling back on my arms hard at the same time. He impaled me even further, and I grunted and then cried out again from the pain. I was certain I was bleeding now. I was bent back from where he had hold of my wrists and arms, my breasts were actually raising up off the bed.

He let go of my wrists, and instead grabbed my long hair and pulled my head back all the way. I found myself looking at the bedroom wall and ceiling, and feeling like my scalp was being removed – a burning sensation that made me sob and plead once again.

“Jason, please… this hurts so bad, please, I will be good — auggghhhhhhhh…” I grunted and cried once again as his cock plunge all the way in and my legs jerked wide as his hips pushed them apart.

His cock slipped out, about half way and then jammed in again, all the way. I could feel his testicles slap against my pussy and heard him grunt with satisfaction. Once again he withdrew and then plunged deep.

Either my sphincter was relaxing or my entire ass had been split open, for he began fucking my ass with a steady motion. The horrible ripping feeling had faded and was replaced with the sensation of having a hard, wide rod shoved deep inside me leaving abrasions as it went. Which was, of course, exactly what was happening.

I raised up a bit, trying to get my ass up into an angle that would give him better access, both to please him and to reduce my own pain. It was hard, because he kept pulling back on my hair so far my back was arched and my breasts had risen up completely off the sheets. I supported myself by my extended arms now, to help relieve the tearing pressure on my scalp as he pulled my long hair back with each thrust.

He was grunting with each thrust, and I was making involuntary noises as well, “ah.. ahh… ah.. help… god… oh… oh… aaah… aaaaahhh…” I had forgotten how huge his cock was. I could feel the ridges of his stiffness, and sliding of his flesh inside me as he moved back and forth and my own anus distended and hugging his cock as he withdrew and then plunged deep.

I struggled a little, not really consciously, but being ass raped like this, with my head bent backward and hair pulled almost out of my scalp made me lose a bit of my mind. I tried to move my arms, wriggle my legs, but nothing helped. He had hold of me in a solid position and was fucking me as hard as he could. I could feel his cock getting even harder as his thrusts jerked harder and more quickly.

He suddenly let go of my hair and I fell back down on the bed. His hands went to my hips, which he grabbed securely and shoved hard back against his own. I had stopped crying, and was simply grunting from the pressure of his thrusts. With a sudden single hard thrust he cried out, and I felt the convulsions of his cock begin.

His orgasm seemed to last forever. Spurt after spurt, his cock contracted and convulsed in my ass. I lay there and felt it inside me, felt the warmth of his semen as it filled me inside, and the continuing moans that accompanied his climax. It hurt, a throbbing pain, but the pain seemed slightly soothed by the pleasure he was experiencing inside me. I was still his slave, his fuck toy, his wife.

When he was done, he collapsed on top of me, and I lay unmoving. My tears had stopped flowing though my cheeks were still very wet. The blanket underneath my face was soaking wet from my tears and from saliva – I must have drooled quite a bit while he was fucking me. I lay, feeling his weight on my back, his cock still inside my ass, but getting smaller.

Eventually, he slowly slid out of my anus, and the feeling of his departure was both a relief and slightly painful as the raw flesh of my damaged insides slid together. I grunted a little and moaned. As he stood, he warned me to remain exactly where I was on the bed, and so I remained motionless, on my stomach, legs hanging over the edge and spread wide.

When he returned, he gently spread my ass cheeks apart.

“Siobhan, you need a real lesson in obedience. The pain of your assrape is the beginning. My semen is inside you and will remain there for a while as a reminder, I may continue the lesson later this week.”

I felt something pressing against my anus once again, something cool and smooth. It slowly spread me farther and farther apart, until my anus was stretched wider than Jason ever could. I recognized the feeling as I whimpered in the pain – he was inserting a butt plug. A big one, too from the feeling. He wanted to plug up my ass, remind me of what he had done and make sure his semen stayed inside me for a while.

When the butt plug reached its widest point, and my pain from being spread and stretched was the worst, it suddenly got smaller. My sphincter automatically closed around the narrow neck of the plug, and it was clear from the feeling of complete and total discomfort and fullness that there was no way I would get the plug out without pulling it out, and then only with some pain. It was in there for a while.

While I still lay in bed on my stomach, Jason took my leash chain and fixed it to my handcuffs, raising my wrists painfully to the middle of my back. In this position, my wrists were held up high, attached to the collar around my neck, preventing me from reaching the ass plug.

Jason raised me up, and wiped my tears. I was still wearing my top, but was nude from my waist down. He led me downstairs, and we finished our evening together in this manner. He allowed me to eat dinner in a dog dish, as my hands were still restrained behind me. Later we watched some TV before retiring for the night.

That night I slept with the butt plug and Jason’s semen securely inside me, my wrists raised uncomfortably behind my back. While the pain in my ass subsided, I wondered what he had meant when he said… “I may continue the lesson later this week.“

Slavery to my husband has been wonderfully fulfilling to me in ways I never imagined. Feeling completely owned, completely devoted, completely possessed by him is a dream come true. Acts of discipline reinforce the relationship, and remind me of my subservient position in ways that make me feel excited, happy. Part of the reason for this is that my slavery is such an opposite experience to my outside life.

I am in management in the IT department of a large company, a professional with a number of direct reports. There, I must exercise my mind, wield control, make decisions and manage complex outcomes. Work can sometimes be stressful, and preoccupies my mind. It was this tendency of getting caught up in work that prompted a very practical lesson from Jason.

I was home late from work, for the third night in a row.

“Jason, I am sorry, but the server upgrades are going slower than planned and we have to set up the downtime for the weekend.”

Jason looked upset.

“Siobhan, I understand. I really do. And your financial contribution to our finances is great, and I support your work. But dear, you not only have a responsibility here at home, you have a –”

Cutting him short, I argued with what I knew he would say. “Yes, I know. I know. I am yours, I know this and I intend to fulfill my duties. But right now work is simply demanding, and you know how IT is.”

The argument went on a little further. Jason was entering one of his cool rages, and it testifies to how wrapped up in work I was that I missed the warning signs. But I did, and suddenly, without saying a word, he reached out, snapped a leash chain to my permanent slave collar, and started leading me upstairs.

“Jason, I am sorry. I didn’t mean disrespect… please… don’t punish me.” I knew by now I had overstepped and he was not pleased at all. I was his slave, and he was about to remind me of that fact.

When we reached our bedroom, he yanked the chain to the bed. He then turned me, pushed me onto the bed face down, and drew my wrists behind my back. Handcuffs snapped into place and I lay there, beginning to cry just a little but not moving. I knew that I needed to be very still and obey his every word at this point, if I was going to minimize his anger and the punishment.

Jason took hold of my skirt and pulled it down my legs with a single hard yank. The fabric tore as it went down, and the zipper scraped my thigh (leaving a long welt which I discovered later). I yelped more from surprise than pain but managed to stay still, laying on my stomach, with my legs over the edge of the bed.

My panties were yanked down next, and easily, leaving my ass exposed and just on the edge of the mattress. I was crying now, tears running down my cheeks and I buried my face in the blanket, unable to wipe them off.

I heard Jason remove his pants, and then his naked legs came between mine, spreading them. His hands grabbed my ass cheeks, and pulled them wide apart. I realized with a twinge of panic what he was going to do.

“Please, please… Jason, don’t do this. You know how it hurts, I am sorry and will behave… please at least use lube…”

The tip of his cock pressed against my anus. I buried my head once more and concentrated on relaxing as best I could. It was hard, I was paniced and emotionally very upset. Pushing back on his cock as he pressed in, hard, I could feel it begin to penetrate my rectum… and then the pain started.

Jason’s cock isn’t huge, but it is pretty large, and gets very hard when he is aroused. He was impaling my ass without lube, and it was going to hurt. With a sudden, massive shove, his hips thrust and cock jammed into my anus, penetrating several inches. I cried out in pain, I felt like the senstive flesh was being ripped and torn, the muscles over stretched. I wriggled some, and he slapped my ass hard with his hand several times.

“Oh god oh god oh god...” I was whimpering, and then the second massive shove came. My scream was muffled from where my face was buried in the bedding, and I tried to struggle. He grabbed my handcuffed wrists and pulled on them, yanking my shoulders back painfully, raising my head out of the bed and shoving my ass back onto his huge cock.

My sphincter was completely convulsing around him, trying to expel him with no success. He withdrew a few inches, and then shoved again, this time pulling back on my arms hard at the same time. He impaled me even further, and I grunted and then cried out again from the pain. I was certain I was bleeding now. I was bent back from where he had hold of my wrists and arms, my breasts were actually raising up off the bed.

He let go of my wrists, and instead grabbed my long hair and pulled my head back all the way. I found myself looking at the bedroom wall and ceiling, and feeling like my scalp was being removed – a burning sensation that made me sob and plead once again.

“Jason, please… this hurts so bad, please, I will be good — auggghhhhhhhh…” I grunted and cried once again as his cock plunge all the way in and my legs jerked wide as his hips pushed them apart.

His cock slipped out, about half way and then jammed in again, all the way. I could feel his testicles slap against my pussy and heard him grunt with satisfaction. Once again he withdrew and then plunged deep.

Either my sphincter was relaxing or my entire ass had been split open, for he began fucking my ass with a steady motion. The horrible ripping feeling had faded and was replaced with the sensation of having a hard, wide rod shoved deep inside me leaving abrasions as it went. Which was, of course, exactly what was happening.

I raised up a bit, trying to get my ass up into an angle that would give him better access, both to please him and to reduce my own pain. It was hard, because he kept pulling back on my hair so far my back was arched and my breasts had risen up completely off the sheets. I supported myself by my extended arms now, to help relieve the tearing pressure on my scalp as he pulled my long hair back with each thrust.

He was grunting with each thrust, and I was making involuntary noises as well, “ah.. ahh… ah.. help… god… oh… oh… aaah… aaaaahhh…” I had forgotten how huge his cock was. I could feel the ridges of his stiffness, and sliding of his flesh inside me as he moved back and forth and my own anus distended and hugging his cock as he withdrew and then plunged deep.

I struggled a little, not really consciously, but being ass raped like this, with my head bent backward and hair pulled almost out of my scalp made me lose a bit of my mind. I tried to move my arms, wriggle my legs, but nothing helped. He had hold of me in a solid position and was fucking me as hard as he could. I could feel his cock getting even harder as his thrusts jerked harder and more quickly.

He suddenly let go of my hair and I fell back down on the bed. His hands went to my hips, which he grabbed securely and shoved hard back against his own. I had stopped crying, and was simply grunting from the pressure of his thrusts. With a sudden single hard thrust he cried out, and I felt the convulsions of his cock begin.

His orgasm seemed to last forever. Spurt after spurt, his cock contracted and convulsed in my ass. I lay there and felt it inside me, felt the warmth of his semen as it filled me inside, and the continuing moans that accompanied his climax. It hurt, a throbbing pain, but the pain seemed slightly soothed by the pleasure he was experiencing inside me. I was still his slave, his fuck toy, his wife.

When he was done, he collapsed on top of me, and I lay unmoving. My tears had stopped flowing though my cheeks were still very wet. The blanket underneath my face was soaking wet from my tears and from saliva – I must have drooled quite a bit while he was fucking me. I lay, feeling his weight on my back, his cock still inside my ass, but getting smaller.

Eventually, he slowly slid out of my anus, and the feeling of his departure was both a relief and slightly painful as the raw flesh of my damaged insides slid together. I grunted a little and moaned. As he stood, he warned me to remain exactly where I was on the bed, and so I remained motionless, on my stomach, legs hanging over the edge and spread wide.

When he returned, he gently spread my ass cheeks apart.

“Siobhan, you need a real lesson in obedience. The pain of your assrape is the beginning. My semen is inside you and will remain there for a while as a reminder, I may continue the lesson later this week.”

I felt something pressing against my anus once again, something cool and smooth. It slowly spread me farther and farther apart, until my anus was stretched wider than Jason ever could. I recognized the feeling as I whimpered in the pain – he was inserting a butt plug. A big one, too from the feeling. He wanted to plug up my ass, remind me of what he had done and make sure his semen stayed inside me for a while.

When the butt plug reached its widest point, and my pain from being spread and stretched was the worst, it suddenly got smaller. My sphincter automatically closed around the narrow neck of the plug, and it was clear from the feeling of complete and total discomfort and fullness that there was no way I would get the plug out without pulling it out, and then only with some pain. It was in there for a while.

While I still lay in bed on my stomach, Jason took my leash chain and fixed it to my handcuffs, raising my wrists painfully to the middle of my back. In this position, my wrists were held up high, attached to the collar around my neck, preventing me from reaching the ass plug.

Jason raised me up, and wiped my tears. I was still wearing my top, but was nude from my waist down. He led me downstairs, and we finished our evening together in this manner. He allowed me to eat dinner in a dog dish, as my hands were still restrained behind me. Later we watched some TV before retiring for the night.

That night I slept with the butt plug and Jason’s semen securely inside me, my wrists raised uncomfortably behind my back. While the pain in my ass subsided, I wondered what he had meant when he said… “I may continue the lesson later this week.“